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Bad Movie Night

Twilight Zone Live:
Season X

Ask Dr. Hal

The Business

Breaking Seinfeld

Twilight Zone Live: Season X

Submitted for your approval.

Time: The present.

Place: A small dark stage, deep in the heart of the Mission.

It is a stage as vast as space and as timeless as infinity.
It is the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and superstition, and it lies between the pit of man's fears, the summit of his knowledge and the black box we call...The Dark Room Theater.

Once again the return of spring and its promise of renewal becomes but a summer sign post up ahead, next stop?

This year we assemble 16 directors, 8 Rod Serlings and various "commercials" for 8 weekends of ironic thrillers from the Twilight Zone pantheon performed live on our diminutive stage!!

"Applauded wildly," writes SF Chronicle, "Played for sheer fun!"

As always, the show resets every week, so you can come all eight weekends and see a different pair of episodes and a new Rod Serling.

Week One: June 7 - 8
"Mirror Image"
directed by Lauren Davidson
"The Lonely"
directed by Dean Mermell
Dan Foley as Rod.

Week Two: June 14 - 15
"A World of His Own"
directed by Craig Souza
"Perilous Fight"
directed by Peter Illes
Dene Larsen as Rod.

Week Three: June 21 - 22
"From Agnes With Love"
directed by Rhiannon Charisse
"Nothing In The Dark"
directed by Ham Pants Productions
Adam Curry as Rod.

Week Four: June 28 - 29
"I Am The Night—Color Me Black"
directed by Patrick Simms
"Frisby and Hocus Pocus"
directed by Melinda Bailey
Sherilyn Connelly as Rod.

Week Five: July 5 - 6
"The Bard"
directed by David J. Moore
"Escape Clause"
directed by Dan Wilson
Diane Nathaniel as Rod (featuring the SPARKLEPONIES).


Week Six: July 12 - 13
"Queen Of The Nile"
directed by David Robson
"In His Image"
directed by Tim Kay
Thomas Apley as Rod.

Week Seven: July 19 - 20
"The Obsolete Man"
directed by Alexia Staniotes
"One More Pallbearer"
directed by Mike Spiegelman
Rajeev as Rod.

Week Eight: July 26 - 27
"Perchance To Dream"
directed by Thomas Apley
"Will the Real Martian Please Stand Up?"
directed by Ralph Hoy
James Galileo as Rod.

Tickets: $20 at the door,
or online at tz10.eventbrite.com/.

Fridays and Saturdays at 8pm
June 7 - July 27, 2013

Ask Dr. Hal

The Church of the Subgenius and Dark Room Productions are happy to present the Ask Dr. Hal Show, live on stage once again! Admission FREE! Yes FREE!!!!

Amazing! Astonishing! Astounding! You will pay to know what you really think!
Prophetic and Oracular answers given.

Featuring the weird powers of Dr. Howlin' Owl, and featuring your host for the night, Radio Valencia's own John Hell. Also on hand are soundsmith KROB, IT Visuals by the Dark Room's Sherilyn Connelly, science liaison Pete Goldie, sardonic poet Rusty Rebar, joculatrix extraordinaire Spy Emerson, and the mello cello of Cello Joe. Also included are animated cartoons, horrifying monster movie footage, mystery guests, bardic recitations, surprises, low-rent miracles and of course LAFFS!

Doors open at 9:45 and show starts at 10 PM.

Tickets: Free!

Friday, June 21, 2013
10:00pm

Breaking Seinfeld

Do you miss Jerry, George, Kramer & Elaine? Is the Soup Nazi Seinfeld episode one of your favorites?

Are you beside yourself with anticipation for the last season of Breaking Bad? Wanna relive how it all began?

If you answered YES to any or all of these, then we've got what you're looking for!

Breaking Bad pilot & Seinfeld's Soup Nazi episode on stage!

Get your tix soon, since we expect to sell out!

Tickets: $20 at the door,
or $15 online at brownpapertickets.com/event/396493

Fridays and Saturdays at 8pm
August 9 - 17, 2013

The Business

Best Alternative Comedy show in San Francisco. Featuring comedians from Comedy Central, SXSW, and the Comedians of Comedy tour! For more info, visit thebusinesscomedy.blogspot.com.

Tickets: $5 at the door, or online.

June Tickets:
https://the-business-sf-june13.eventbrite.com/

July Tickets:
https://the-business-07-13.eventbrite.com/

Every Wednesday 8PM $5

Bad Movie Night

Every Sunday 8PM $6.99

In the tradition of Mystery Science Theater 3000,
except you can't tell which ones are the robots.
— David Manning

Cinema is our culture's dominant art form.
It holds up a mirror to who we are.
It reflects our society, our dreams, our hopes, our fears.
Our films are how future generations are going to judge us.

Unfortunately, most of them suck.

Seriously, though—ever notice how you can't walk down the street or open a magazine or stand in line at a store or simply exist without ads for some dumbass multi-zillion dollar movie about a talking kangaroo being shoved down your throat?

And then they expect you to pay fifteen dollars to see it in some googolplex, and after sitting through a half hour of commercials? Or watch it on DVD and have to sit through even more commercials and anti-piracy ads that you can't skip past? Doesn't it all just piss you off?

If so—or if you just like to have a good time—then Bad Movie Night is for you.

Laugh with the hosts riffing on the movie. Yell your own comments. Try to figure out what the hell "Skull Films!" means. Help yourself to the free popcorn. Enjoy the non-alcoholic beverage of your choice purchased from the store across the street. Don't worry if the guy behind the counter glares at you. He does that to everyone.

Best of all, only pay six measly bucks (and ninety-nine measly cents).

Join us.

Read!	Sherilyn Connelly's 2007 essay about Bad Movie Night at Medialoper. The Top 10 "Wait, What?" Moments from Bad Movie Night, Part 1: A - M, and Part 2: N - Z, from 2011 on sfweekly.com.
Watch!	The Bad Movie Night slideshow on sfgate.com.
Listen!	A bootleg of our 1/6/08 show (Snakes on a Plane), recorded by Giannii.
Obey!	The Bad Movie Survival Guide on io9, written by us.
Pine!	All the Bad Movie Nights you missed from 2013, 2012, 2011, 2010, 2009, 2008, 2007 and 2005-2006! If you'd rather not wait for several dozen MBs of graphics to load, here's a bare-bones alphabetical list of all the movies we've done.
Scroll!	Through the previous monthly banners, just because.
Listen More!	Peter Finch's Fog Files covering Bad Movie Night, Mystery Science Theater 3000, and movie riffing in general.

Sunday, June 16, 2013, 6pm

rhiannon and sherilyn's
poltergeist double feature
birthday sleepover! still $6.99!

It's that time of the year: in honor of the birthdays of The Dark Room's favorite Geminis, Rhiannon (June 12) and myself (June 16), we're riffing on the two Poltergeist movies, which are both very lousy. In a row. Back to back.

By the way, I was born on June 16, 1973, so come help my celebrate the lifetime's worth of questionable choices that have resulted in me watching the fucking Poltergeist sequels on my 40th birthday!

It'll be more Heather O'Rourke than you can shake a stick at. And why would you shake a stick at her, anyway? Damn, you suck.

But that's okay, because you're still our BFF, and we totally want you to come to our birthday party, okay? It's going to be a total blast, we swear. Our parents are out of town and it's just going to be a whole lot of fun and you don't have to stay for the whole time if you want to and just please show up, okay?

We know it's a schoolnight for a lot of you, so we're starting early: 6pm. That's when we're going to watch the 1986 Poltergeist II, with Mikl-Em co-hosting. At 8pm-ish we'll watch Poltergeist III with Mike Spiegelman, and after that we'll all go home and go to bed.

Oh, and presents? Don't worry about it. Your presence is your present.

If you really wanna get us stuff, here's Rhiannon's Amazon wish list, and this is mine, though blank DVD-Rs always make me happy.

Though nothing would make me and Rhiannon happier than you joining us this Sunday, 'kay? 'kay.

Be sure to get there at 6pm for maximum Rourke.

June 23, 2013 House on Haunted Hill (1999) No, House on Haunted Hill is not related to The Haunting of Hill House. Why would you even think that? Mountainous pandemonium reigns. Hosts: Jim Fourniadis, Mike Spiegelman, Tim Kay, and other spooks.

June 30, 2013 Amityville II: The Possession The even more-true prequel to the "true story" that was made up in the first place. Possessive wackiness ensues. Hosts: Sherilyn Connelly, Mikl-Em, Dan Foley, and other Montellis.

July 7, 2013 The Blair Witch Project The one that started it all. ("It all" being throwing up in the movie theater, that is.) Handheld wackiness ensues. Hosts: Sherilyn Connelly, Mikl-Em, Ira Emsig, and other virals.

July 14, 2013 Paranormal Activity 4 Answering all the unanswered questions from the first three, except for why there were already three. Webcammed pandemonium reigns. Hosts: Jim Fourniadis, Tristan Buckner, Alexia Staniotes, and other camgirls.

July 21, 2013 Apollo 18 The filmmakers call the monsters on the moon "moonsters," which tells you everything you need to know. . Houston, we have wackiness ensuing. Hosts: Sherilyn Connelly, Mikl-Em, Tim Kay, and other cosmonauts.

July 28, 2013 Quarantine People in a building go nuts as a virus attacks, and someone keeps filming it on their camcorder, as you will. Also, was trounced at the box office by behind Beverly Hills Chihuahua. Pandemical pandemonium reigns. Hosts: Jim Fourniadis, Mike Spiegelman, Maura Sipila, and other detainees.

August 4, 2013 The Raid: Redemption A cop who knows martial arts fucks a lot of people's shit up. Unredeemed wackiness ensues. Hosts: Sherilyn Connelly, Mikl-Em, Rose Lacy, and other raiders.

August 11, 2013 Hobo With a Shotgun A homeless guy with big gun fucks a lot of people's shit up. Homeless pandemonium reigns. Hosts: Jim Fourniadis, Dan Foley, and other tramps.

August 18, 2013 Punisher: War Zone A vigilante with a lot of guns fucks a lot of people's shit up. Collateral wackiness ensues. Hosts: Sherilyn Connelly, Mike Spiegelman, Tristan Buckner, and other zoners.

August 25, 2013 Ninja Assassin A ninja who knows martial arts (duh!) fucks a lot of people's shit up. Stealth pandemonium reigns. Hosts: Jim Fourniadis, Mikl-Em, John Hell, and other Shinobi.

September 1, 2013 The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn, Part 2 Because OMG Bella and Edward!!! Sparkly wackiness will finally cease to ensue. Hosts: Sherilyn Connelly, Mikl-Em, Alexia Staniotes, and other Renesmees .

September 8, 2013 The Hunger Games Teenagers battle each other royally in a futuristic dystopia. Also, they are hungry. Gamey pandemonium reigns. Hosts: Jim Fourniadis, Sherilyn Connelly, Tristan Buckner, and other mockingjays.

September 15, 2013 The Host (2013) In Stephenie Meyer's first post-Twilight novel, a girl is possessed by an alien which does not result in sparkly skin, so what's even the point? More mormon wackiness ensues. Hosts: Sherilyn Connelly, Mike Spiegelman, Ira Emsig, and other wanderers.

September 22, 2013 Beautiful Creatures (2013) They're not "witches," they're "casters," you racist. Gothic pandemonium reigns. Hosts: Jim Fourniadis, Mikl-Em, Tim Kay, and other aesthically pleasing beings.

September 29, 2013 The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey Short people with hairy feet start walking somewhere again. HFR wackiness ensues. Hosts: Jim Fourniadis, Mike Spiegelman, Maura Sipila, and other Bombadils.

October 6, 2013 The Exorcist The movie that made people realize that pea soup is actually kinda gross-looking. Tubular wackiness ensues. Hosts: Jim Fourniadis, Mike Spigelman, John Hell, and other Blattys.

October 13, 2013 Exorcist II: The Heretic The movie that made people realize that Richard Burton is actually drunk most of the time. Apostatic pandemonium reigns. Hosts: Sherilyn Connelly, Mikl-Em, Ira Emsig, and other Pazuzus.

October 20, 2013 The Exorcist III The movie that didn't make people realize anything, since they didn't see it. Wackiness (which is legion) ensues. Hosts: Jim Fourniadis, Mike Spiegelman, Alexia Staniotes, and other Dourifs.

October 27, 2013 Exorcist: The Beginning The movie that shouldn't have been made in the first place (and this is the second try at the third sequel.) Pandemonium with no end reigns. Hosts: Sherilyn Connelly, Mikl-Em, Dan Foley, and other Harlineqins.

November 3, 2013 Book of Shadows: Blair Witch 2 No, it didn't make much sense at the time, either. Unreadable wackiness ensues. Hosts: Sherilyn Connelly, Mikl-Em, Tim Kay, and other Berlingers.

November 10, 2013 Speed 2: Cruise Control Because if "Die Hard on a bus" worked for the first movie, then why not "Die Hard on a bus boat" for the second movie? Why not, indeed. Keanu-free pandemonium reigns. Hosts: Jim Fourniadis, Ziad Ezzat, Rose Lacy, and other Bullocks.

November 17, 2013 Leatherface: Texas Chainsaw Massacre 3 The second sequel to the first Texas Chainsaw, and the first movie to make the second sequel look good. Overtanned wackiness ensues. Hosts: Sherilyn Connelly, Mike Spiegelman, Maura Sipila, and other Viggos.

November 24, 2013 Highlander 2: The Quickening If any movie should have killed the possibility of furture sequels, it's this one. It should have gone back in time and killed the original, in fact. Slow pandemonium reigns. Hosts: Jim Fourniadis, Mikl-Em, Dan Foley, and other McLeods.

December 1, 2013 Santa Claus: The Movie The guys who made the first three Superman movies try to do the same with Santa Claus. It turns out about as well as Superman IV. Reindeer-powered wackiness ensues. Hosts: Sherilyn Connelly, Tristan Buckner, Maura Sipila and other blitzens.

December 8, 2013 It's a Wonderful Life Frank Capra and Jimmy Stewart relieve every sitcom ever made from having to come up with an original idea for a Christmas episode. Suicidal wackiness ensues. Hosts: Jim Fourniadis, Alexia Staniotes, John Hell, and other bell-ringers.

December 15, 2013 The Nutcracker in 3-D The children's story no child actually likes becomes a nighmare-inducing CGI abomination for all ages. Unshelled wackiness ensues. Hosts: Sherilyn Connelly, Mikl-Em, Tim Kay, and other ballbusters.

December 22, 2013 Black Christmas (2007) A killer stalks nubile young women at a sorority house. One of them is Buffy's annoying younger sister, so it's not such a bad thing. Pandemonium reigns and tinsel flies. Hosts: Jim Fourniadis, Ira Emsig, Mike Spiegelman, and other baggers.

December 29, 2013 The Polar Express A terrifying CGI train ride deep into the Uncanny Valley, where lifeless collections of pixels take on a vaguely human form to haunt your deepest nightmares. Dead-eyed wackiness ensues. Hosts: Sherilyn Connelly, Ziad Ezzat, Dan Foley, and other valley-dwellers.

1/5/14: Snakes on a Plane    (Our annual kickoff movie!) 1/12/14: Iron Man 3 1/19/14: The Great Gatsby (2013) 1/26/14: Star Trek Into Darkness

The itty-bitty Bad Movie Night Archive links: 2013 | 2012 | 2011 | 2010 | 2009 | 2008 | 2007 | 2005-2006